THE TRUTH ABOUT TAKING THE BROKEN COOKIE

Those of you with school age children will know (all too well) that its been half term. And in school holidays, between all the demands on our time, we tend to come last. As a temporary situation, this is okay. We know that they'll be back to school next week and normal service will resume. 

But it hasn't always been this way. As career experts we try to practice what we preach. This is one of our weak points and for a long time, we constantly put ourselves last. We didn't feel comfortable asking for credit, so although we'd been largely responsible for big wins/projects/features, we'd push colleagues forward ahead of ourselves. We didn't want to come across as show-offs or, worse, pushy so we diluted our role in the success and our share of the profits.

We were offering the beautiful whole cookies to everyone else and taking the broken cookie for ourselves. 

And it wasn't our fault. As women, we are socialised to take the broken cookie. We believe we need to look after others, to sacrifice to make sure everyone else is happy (click to tweet this).This might (sometimes) be okay at home. But at work, this behaviour allows others to steal our thunder and take our success away from us: we may perform admirably, but then we conform to society’s expectations by standing back and taking second place.

This is effectively self-sabotage and we knew it had to change. So we took the decision to consciously take the whole, freshly baked cookie for ourselves.

How? By challenging ourselves to CONSCIOUSLY TAKE THE CREDIT. When someone congratulates us now, we graciously say thank you rather than dismissing the praise. If it's a team effort, we're careful to highlight that too, but we are equally willing to take our credit where it's due. We ask for what we believe we deserve and catch ourselves when fall back into our old ways. We even - and this took some doing - take time out for ourselves(whether with a long bath, selfish coffee break with a good book or favourite pilates class). We take the whole cookie and enjoy it too.

Have you been holding on to the broken cookie? Don't you deserve a lovely whole one for yourself? We challenge you to consciously take the credit this week, reclaim some time for yourself and just generally put yourself first for a change. Then report back with the results. 

x Alice and Phanella x